Left Behind
by Fluitare
Summary: To leave on a Pokemon journey, by definition, means someone loses you. Series of one-shots about the broken tears and mended hearts of those who stayed behind.
1. Pokegear

**Pokegear**

_*RING* *RING* Call from Mom._

* * *

I know you mean well.

I already know what you'll say.

The endless array of packages and gifts you send me aren't for me, they're for you.

I love you dearly, mother, but do you know why I left? It was the only way I could be free of your overbearing protectiveness.

I know you say I never call you, but that's because you call me enough for both of us.

It was hard when Chrissy died, I know. I was there, and I couldn't save my own sister from the Gyarados. How do you think I feel? But all you could think of was how no one was good enough to save your baby girl. You blamed me and father.

I know that was why he left. Because you were sucking the life out of him; constantly, endlessly reproaching him for letting Chrissy die. As if father hadn't done everything, everything, to try and save her. She was his daughter, too.

I know you didn't mean to hurt him. You thought that no one could tell you blamed father, that you'd melodramatically suffer in silence for what he had done. You were wrong. Everyone knew who you thought was at fault.

And when you had lost Chrissy and father, you became so terrified I'd leave or die or not love you anymore that you smothered me, and I had to leave just to breathe.

You're always telling me on the phone what a good, sweet girl Lyra-across-the-way is. I know, mother. I know her better than you do, I'm sure, and I know that she's an amazing, talented, wonderful girl. But that's not why you love her.

You love Lyra because she stays at home, and stays with her parents. Because she hasn't even started her Pokemon journey yet.

We were going to go on our journey together, as best friends and rivals, since Professor Elm told us that was proper, even though we could never think of ourselves as rivals. We were allies.

She wasn't ready when she was ten, and I wasn't sure I was, either. So we both waited a while, to see if we would be ready next year. And then Chrissy died, and father left, and by the time we were eleven, I couldn't stand living with you any more.

She understood. She smiled, and told me to go off on my adventures with Silver, and we both knew she what she meant: Silver and not me.

So I did. She offered a gift much more valuable than all the berries you could ever send me, and I took it, unthinkingly. Sometimes I hate you for forcing me to leave Lyra, who was my best friend, behind. She isn't much of a friend any more, though it isn't for lack of effort from either of us. Our lives are too different now, and it's awkward and strange.

I escaped your clinging fingers, at a price I didn't fully recognize then. I have few acquaintances, and fewer friends. No home, and no family. Do you know how long it's been since I slept somewhere besides a Pokecenter or my tent?

Sometimes, irony mocks me, and I eat some of the berries you've sent for my dinner. A dinner I eat in a cold, lonely tent, because I'm trying to escape you.

But most of the time, I just let the messenger boy hold on to my packages for ages, because I don't stop at Pokemarts often. And when I do, I sometimes sneak past him to buy my Pokeballs, and I let him hold on to them for another age.

You call so often now. Do you know how you're losing me? Is this how you try to stop the slow, steady tide of forgetfulness?

The first time I ignored you was by accident. I was running in the Pokeathlon, and I happened to hit the Terminate Call button right as you rang. I did call you back and explain, mother, as soon as I was finished running.

The second time I ignored you was because I was talking with Silver, which is rare, and he wasn't spitting fire, which is rarer. It was important, mother, and I could always call you back.

The third time I ignored you, you had already called twice that day, and I was exhausted. I listened to your message, once you had hung up, but I didn't need to call you back. So I didn't.

I'm tempted to stop sending the usual portion of my winnings to you. You would stop sending me random little oddities, at least, and then you'd stop calling to tell me about it. But I know you haven't worked since—well, since I left. Lyra told me.

You would starve without my money.

So I accept your gifts, even if I leave them in the grubby hands of the messenger boy for months at a time.

I accept what you try to tell me through them, and I think I know better than you do what you're trying to say; don't leave me. Do you know what you don't say? 'I love you.'

I'll keep sending you money, and you'll keep sending me gifts.

But I can't pick up the Pokegear and talk to you, no matter how many times you call me.

* * *

_*RING* *RING* Call from Mom._

_..._

…

_Call Terminated.  
_


	2. Waiting For The Sun

**Waiting For You**

It's a typical July night in Victory Road, which is to say it's cold, dark, and gloomy. I'm rather cramped here, Sapphy. I don't own any fire-type Pokemon, and it's chilly down here. Will you come soon?

You promised.

* * *

The day you promised was a beautiful, bright, sunny day (like always) on Indigo Plateau, and for once the light and warmth had crept down the cave walls into Victory Road. I swear it happens every time you're here.

You beat me that day, I'll be the first to admit it.

I had thought...

I thought I could prove myself by winning against you. Maybe I could have then, when that was all that mattered in the world, but there are such stronger things now to fight. Things that you can't just knock out and declare victory.

You were such a perfect winner. I've never defeated you, but I imagine you'd be so polite I would feel bad. Maybe it's easier to lose than to win. I wouldn't know.

And when I told you that I would beat you someday, you told me you were going to win against the Elite Four and Champion. And then you'd come here every day because you would be the Champion. So you offered to battle me, every day, when you left for the night, to go home to Littleroot and Brendan Birch.

And I promised that no matter what, I would be right here, waiting for you.

* * *

Even though I spend my evenings in a dark, gloomy cave, they are the brightest part of my day, because I see you again.

But I'm afraid, Sapphy, so very afraid.

You didn't come yesterday. I know nothing happened to you, because I saw you take off into the night sky when you left Indigo Plateau.

And without you, the sun, the planets of my life are beginning to fall out of orbit.

* * *

A couple years ago, Sapphy, I met Karen again. We were friends a long time ago, before I moved to Verdanturf. She was the strong, vibrant, bossy one, the one who waited on the road for traveling trainers. She reminds me of you, which is strange, because I met her far earlier.

I think that she loves me.

I hope her heart doesn't end as broken as mine is.

* * *

I've been here for forty-eight hours now. Gardevoir is worried sick about me, and maybe she's right to be. I can feel my asthma coming back, that cough I thought I had left behind in Petalburg.

I've ignored countless calls from Karen on my PokeNav. My aunt and uncle know I sometimes don't pick up, and they'll reassure her that I'm fine. She would never understand what keeps me here, waiting for the sun to rise in a cave below the surface.

I promised you that I would always be here, waiting for you to come and battle with me, and I will, no matter what.

But please, Sapphire, come soon.

It's very cold and dark and lonely here, far from the sun.


	3. Somebody I Used to Know

**Somebody that I used to know**

* * *

The same day you arrived in Littleroot, you came to visit me. You were so very bright and beautiful and alive that day.

I offered you to catch you a Pokemon the next day, but you went and got yourself a better one from father without waiting for me. Story of my life.

The Torchic father gave you suited your spark much more than any common Poochyena or Wurmple I could have caught you, anyway.

I was surprised when you beat my Mudkip. I'd been a Trainer for much longer than you, but I suppose it shouldn't have been such a shock. You were always gifted in all the many ways I wasn't.

You surpassed me easily. The badge I fought so hard with Roxanne for? It took you ten minutes, tops, to do the whole gym.

In the end, I stopped following you. I, who started off with every advantage except the one we can never measure, was struggling pathetically to keep up with you. I never did get past Tate and Liza. I smiled at Wally when he began to follow you, and told him you and I weren't meant to be. I hope he had a better fate than me.

I lie on my bed and wonder where I went wrong, and I try to put on a brave face when you come, but it's getting harder. Maybe it's good that you come so rarely now.

You're the Champion, I suppose. You have duties. But I've nearly forgotten your face. Have you forgotten mine?

There's a sort of ache that you're not here beside me. But when you come, I'm lost without the familiar stabbing pain. It's easier to miss you than to be with you.

You're not real to me any more, Sapphire. You're a collection of memories piecing together a broken heart. I'll always love you — you're a part of me.

But I don't know you.


End file.
